the joys of proctoring

i have to proctor an exam today, the second time this week. ugh. today's is to return a favor to a friend (why oh why was i too honest and not make up an excuse about being too busy???). three hours of standing around a classroom and watching undergrads taking their exams. if the prof is really strict, the proctors do not get to sit down and have to vigilently walk up and down rows, checking aisles to make sure no one has cheet sheets or notes open, and hovering over students that are suspiciously looking around or gazing away from their test booklets.

monday's proctoring wasn't so bad, there were three of us with the prof and he didn't mind us sitting down or talking to each other. sometimes i make it into a game and try to characterize the different students:

(1) the overachiever: obviously prepared, moving along at a decent pace. (smilingly because he already knows the answer but still) asks a lot of questions about the test maybe to demonstrate how knowledgable he is about the subtleties of the question. at the end of the exam, he shakes the prof's hand and thanks him for giving the exam (what??!!!) and for all his time.

(2) the slacker: for the first half of the exam time he's answering as much as he can. but after writing down everything that's he's memorized in the past 12-24 hours, he starts staring off into space. . .rather than turning in that test booklet, he just sits. pondering. hoping that something, something that the professor had said in class will come back to him. because he actually went to that class and was not sleeping through the entire thing, what was it??? this is the same student that writes a novel when one or two answers would have answered the question sufficiently (oh and by the way, the right answer wasn't embedded in the paragraphs and paragraphs writeen, arg!!) this is the same student that tries to write so sloppily or just ever so slightly circles two answers rather than one, hoping the grader gives him credit anyway. (note to undergrads: if i can't read it, you will probably not get credit!)

(3) the flirt: dressing up to take an exam (maybe going out afterwards?). after getting the prof's attention for a question she looks up at him through her lashes and gives him a coy smile and asks him her question. ( i never get this, do they do this with female profs too? do guys do this with female profs?) she has an array of colored pens and highlighters to beautify her graphs and answers. she leaves little notes apologizing for being too messy, or directing the grader where to find the remainder of the answer.

*disclaimer: obviously these are stereotypes (and most people are not at these extremes). i have nothing against undergrads having been one myself, i'm just a grad student finding ways to amuse myself! * okay, i have to go proctor. . .